Its been a long time...............

Nothing Fantastic has been happening with me. I am newly single and dating....got a new place....going to a new school soon...and hopefully I will find some new happiness!!! LOL

I finally confessed my love for my ex ( not my most recent one, but the one before him). The only reason we broke up is because I decided to move, and knew that a long distance relationship wouldn't work. So, after 3 years of living in another state, and keeping in touch with him on a "friend" level, I told him I love him and that I have loved him since we were friends in high school. His response " I have always loved you, but I didn't realize how much until you had been gone a year, and it sucked because I couldn't do anything about it."

So where do we go from here? I don't know.....I'm supposed to be going back to L.A. this summer, so perhaps I will find out =). I decided not to go to film school in L.A. But I will be taking some courses to get a Degree in Entertainment Business, and I have a few connections...one who can get be a short term/possibly long term job at a Casting Agency in Victoria, B.C. ( Aka-The new Hollywood) but that's a HUGE step. It would be in a great direction, but I am a single parent . It's not just me anymore.

Writer's block::random

I don't know what the deal is. I have so much I want to say....but I can never put it into words as soon as I log in.

Am I burnt out on blogging?!! That could be what my problem is. I mean, I have had a livejournal account since 1999!!! I have been a member of the blog community for 10 years!!! I even had an xanga account for a little while....lol@ Jin the MC being one of "friends" on there. I wonder what happened to him? He made one album and dropped off the face of the earth.

Let's see..what else is going on with me:

Got Accepted to L.A. Film School- I'm very excited...not sure if I'm going though. Why? Because they only offer an Associates Degree, and I have one already! Not in Film, but I need to focus on my Bachelors-and I haven't been doing that lately due to me having to pay out of pocket for about 30 % of EVERYTHING and its kicking my ass.

I applied to a few other Film Schools though,so we shall see.

Crazy how time flys

Crazy how kids are.

I just got back from my little brother's first basketball game on a High School team. Its amazing how much he has grown. I haven't seen him since he was 10 years old, and he is now 14 and looks exactly like a miniature version of my father. The way he is built, the way he sits & stands....even his voice. It obviously isn't the deep manly voice my father has, but it will be.

As I saw him running up and down the court, I couldn't help but laugh about all the times he slept in my bed.....and had my bed so wet the next morning, you would think he just decided to wake up and relieve himself.....and he would have his head partially tucked under the covers with big eyes, thinking I would tell him he couldn't get his pissy ass back in my bed....but I didn't. I just made sure he was cleaned up before Dad got up, washed everything and made him a man sized bowl of maple & brown sugar oatmeal and watched sponge bob with him.

He was always the kid who loved his big sister...and I always loved him back. I miss being able to carry him on my back, and when he would talk trash to my dad but couldn't say half of the words correctly...lmao!

Wow, my baby brother is becoming a man!!!! Oh LORD!!!! TAKE ME NOW!

For the past 2 months, I have been trying to find a blog community where I feel I belong.

I have ADD when it comes to blogging. Over the past 8 years, I have been a Loyal livejournal blogee, but for some reason…ever since they stopped requiring people have a referral code to join, it isn’t as appealing to me anymore. There are more and more people who have no postings of substance, that continuously add me as a friend ( and unlike Myspace, you cannot deny their requests)…and after reading the posts of some of the people who have added me, I feel like—why?

Why post when the only people who are reading are posting about the latest celebrity gossip, or the people whose only concerns are who said what, who is doing what, how much they hate their life, and why they are deadbeats.

Is blogger different? We shall see. I had a blogspot YEARS ago, when it was in the beta stages...and it sucked...but its looking a little better now.

I guess....

The highlight of my day:
Getting an eye exam, and finding out ya girl needs bifocals...ain't that some fecal matter? Turn 25, and my eyes turned 50! They have a new name for bifocals....they are now " Progressive" lenses...I started cracking up naturally and asked " Ya'll have conservative lenses too?" I guess I am the only one who found that funny...but whatever. My sense of humor us corny, and I know it.

Why

Can't I just win the lottery? Working for other people is for the birds...I need to hurry up and finish school.